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Dr Jeff Cuntingham over iwarrior 16-10  Rate Topic 
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 Posted: Tue Jan 13th, 2009 10:28 pm
   
31st Post
Portalesman
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Unfortunately, most resources for Darren related research have been deleted by the associated boards he has brought his act to. Please feel free to add to this with things you may have saved elsewhere.

Quote: 1. Was he ever regarded as the biggest douche on pro wres message boards? Did anybody, in the past year, ever suggest he was the biggest douche on pro wres message boards?

Yes. Easily. He has been nominated for DBotY the last two years. In his inaugural run, he made it all the way to the finals and only lost due to being pitted against the phenomenal douchebaggery of Mark Nulty. This year he made a strong run to the Final Four, falling to Mike Sweetster. In the process of losing DBotY, he took out such reviled douchebags and HOF nominees as Rob Feinstein, Percy Pringle, Frank Jewitt and Stingmark. It is an endorsement in and of itself that the only douches he has lost to are considered first ballot locks for this revered HOF. Are these enough to make him a first ballot member himself? That is for the voters to decide, but read on.

Quote: 2. Was he the biggest douche on the pro wres message board at which he posts most frequently? Was he a douche on multiple message boards?

Yes and Yes. Without fail, he has been mocked, ridiculed and run off multiple boards due to his douchey activities. His MO when he first came into the public consciousness was to join a board, lurk for a while making the occasional posts, then drop the quintessential douche thread on the populace: �The story of the girl I like�. He posted this on no less than 5 message boards that I am aware of. Unfortunately, most of these boards have deleted the douchey goodness, but there is significant analysis here

Quote: 3. Was he the biggest douche in his pro wres message board circle?

Tough call. His Pro Wres message board circle consists mostly of WC throughout his career with run ins at OSW and WP. Let�s stick with Klassics for my portion of this. No, he�s not. But then again, Wrestling Classics is such a hotbed of high end douchery that it would be difficult to be the BIGGEST douche there short of your last name being Chernau or Nulty.

Quote: 4. Did he have an impact on a number of inane threads and pointless, mind numbing arguments?

Fuck yes. It has taken me this long to put up the CL, due to attempts to find a representative sample of his bullshit. Unfortunately for me, most threads Darren starts/gets heavily involved in wind up being deleted because of his asinine, poor me/white guys own the intarweb musings.

Quote: 5. Was he a big enough douche to be considered a huge douche even when taking a break from online activities? Was he a big enough douche that reasonable points he made were regarded as suspect just because he was the one making them?

Witnessed by how many people use his whinings as sig lines, Darren always has a presence. Even when he ventures out of his mom�s basement, Darren is ALWAYS a presence.

Darren never makes a reasonable point, so it can not be determined if anyone would take him seriously if he did. The feeling is that he would have to make the most mundane oberservation to have someone agree with him, akin to "water is wet" or "eastern european sandwich artists don't like me".

Quote: 6. Is there any evidence to suggest that the douche is a bigger douche than is suggested by his posts on pro wres message boards?

Bigger? Maybe not. The same, identical douche? Yes. He runs the same poor me, I�m too broke for college/girlfriend/going out/being seen in daylight crap on every board he has ever posted on.

Quote: 7. How many asinine or embarrassing things did he post on pro wres message boards? Did they have to do with his pathetic real life or with pro wres? If the latter, did he talk out of his ass on subjects he knew nothing about, microanalyze pro wres matches as if they were art, or otherwise make a fool of himself, or did he just show himself to be a fucktard?

This is where Darren shines. Nothing to do with pro wres itself. It�s all about his pathetic real life. Examples from OLC alone:

The Saddest Thread Ever
iwarrior�s Latest Crisis
iwarrior Goes to School

Quote: 8. What kind of douchery did he exhibit? Was is a relentless drip-drip-drip of outlandish stupidity deserving of euthanasia, or did one or two spectacular moments define him?

Oh�it�s a drip, drip, drip of epic proportions. To wit, the penultimate iwarrior threads:

DBotY 2005 Chernau List...55 fucking pages
IWarrior�center of the universe

Quote: 9. Is this douche capable of using the English language? Does he feel the need to use pro wres jargon to describe normal everyday situations? Does he use some sort of horrible jargon, writing in Engrish, for instance, or writing "trine" instead of "trying to"??

Actually, Darren seems to have a good handle on the English language. I have not been witness to him using Chernauisms.

Quote: 10. If this douche were the biggest douche on a pro wres message board, would that board become an utter laughingstock even if the other posters were respectable?

JRM.com is dead, right?

Quote: 11. What impact did the douche have on pro wres message board douchery? Did he inspire a cult of followers? Did he assume an important role with a money mark promotion? Did he change pro wres message board douchery in any way, for instance by using a series of risible cliches that infested the language with which his acolytes discussed pro wres?

The only impact Darren has had is giving some very diverse personalities a shared focal point upon which to spew the vitriol. I mean, Crimson Douche hates Darren. We hate Darren. What does that say about him? Darren has forced us to have something in common with the prototype of internet douchery.
_________________

Keep in mind, this Chernau list is 2 years old.  There has been 2 years of douchiness that isn't mentioned in this post.



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 Posted: Tue Jan 13th, 2009 11:00 pm
   
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thunderbolt
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Genuine excerpt from a genuine online chat.  Betcha Dr. Jeff couldn't make a dent in this.

"Darren: i have a plunger
with me
now
me: Really? [wink]
Darren: yes, i was experimenting the other night
me: I roll you over on your stomach
and lube you up
Darren: it's in my ass now
me: Tell me you want it
Do you have a camera? This is so hot
Darren: i want it
me: I'm dying here
Darren: no camera "


Not sexy you say?  How is this for a come-on line then?


"Darren: i want to fill your rectum with my penis "



Thank God for no camera is all I can say.  Still time to change those wrong votes.



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 Posted: Tue Jan 13th, 2009 11:02 pm
   
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srossi

 

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thunderbolt wrote: Genuine excerpt from a genuine online chat.  Betcha Dr. Jeff couldn't make a dent in this.

"Darren: i have a plunger
with me
now
me: Really? [wink]
Darren: yes, i was experimenting the other night
me: I roll you over on your stomach
and lube you up
Darren: it's in my ass now
me: Tell me you want it
Do you have a camera? This is so hot
Darren: i want it
me: I'm dying here
Darren: no camera "


Not sexy you say?  How is this for a come-on line then?


"Darren: i want to fill your rectum with my penis "



Thank God for no camera is all I can say.  Still time to change those wrong votes.

That's real life patheticness, not message board douchiness.



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 Posted: Tue Jan 13th, 2009 11:15 pm
   
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HBF



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I was never a WC socially inept tard so I'll pick Dr. Jeff Cuntingham.



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 Posted: Tue Jan 13th, 2009 11:27 pm
   
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WongLee
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Thanks to tbolt and Ports for the great analysis.

IMO, a douche is someone who can piss off virtually anybody on a message board with their retarded comments, poor insight, and non-existent knowledge of the subject matter. Yet, they still will try and come across as a voice of reason. iwarrior only talked about himself. He was/is immensely entertaining. Dr. Jeff is a flat out cunt that is well documentated here and in other places.

I vote for the Jeffy.



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 Posted: Wed Jan 14th, 2009 12:38 am
   
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freebirdsforever2001
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iwarrior sounds like a candidate for a columbine type massacre,  then a plain ol' message board douchebag.



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 Posted: Wed Jan 14th, 2009 01:28 am
   
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khawk
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WongLee wrote: IMO, a douche is someone who can piss off virtually anybody on a message board with their retarded comments, poor insight, and non-existent knowledge of the subject matter. Yet, they still will try and come across as a voice of reason. iwarrior only talked about himself.

 

But he talked about himself as the ONLY voice that made any sense in the crazy world around him. Not just the interweb, but the whole world.

Just sayin'.

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 Posted: Wed Jan 14th, 2009 01:59 am
   
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Portalesman
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khawk wrote: WongLee wrote: IMO, a douche is someone who can piss off virtually anybody on a message board with their retarded comments, poor insight, and non-existent knowledge of the subject matter. Yet, they still will try and come across as a voice of reason. iwarrior only talked about himself.

 

But he talked about himself as the ONLY voice that made any sense in the crazy world around him. Not just the interweb, but the whole world.

Just sayin'.
Kev, dont even bother.  Trying to explain the cretinisms of iwarrior to these people (who claim to not understand him because they didn't post on WC) is like trying to explain Hitler to people.  "He was an old dude who did mean things"



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Sixk of Portalsman and he is a total fucking loser and mark for himself. A bore. Dude has never been laid in his life.

Total piece of garbage and a reason I have left wrestling forums. drdelaware
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 Posted: Wed Jan 14th, 2009 02:17 am
   
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khawk
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Portalesman wrote:  these people (who claim to not understand him because they didn't post on WC)
 

I did laugh when I read that blurb in one of the vote posts.

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