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Fake Football Playoff Advice  Rating:  Rating
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 Posted: Tue Dec 8th, 2015 06:54 pm
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HBF



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I made the playoffs as a 3 seed and play this weekend against a guy who has all Steelers and Bengals. He's a Pittsburgh native who lives in Dayton Ohio.  Hopefully, they have a low-scoring game.

I have some issues that need addressing. We changed the league waiver rules to prevent non-playoff teams from making pickups and I have 3rd pick overall.

Gronk is hurt, and I need a TE. I have Kyle Rudolph (WHO FUCKING SUCKS, don't ever take Kyle Rudolph as he's the new Zach Ertz of "why is he on my team again!) and am thinking of picking up Austin Sefarian Jenkins, who is back  from injury and plays the historically hapless Saints.  Thoughts?  My only other option is the incredible pussy known as Jake Tamme, who plays on a horrible Falcons team.  I'm going to try to pick up Jenkins.

I need to insure Eli as he's sucking balls right now. Tyrod Taylor is on the waiver wire and plays the Iggles, Skins and Dallas. Actually, I could easily start him over Eli and feel good about it. So I will drop the (bad, really bad idea) Bucs D and try to pick up Taylor.  Alex Smith is also available, but there a way too many stories of guys starting Smith in the playoffs and the season ending.  I don't want to be another.

I also have a shitty bench right now. I'm surprised how bad it is. I have Stefon Diggs and Devon Funchess and they both suck. I've got claims in on Devonte Parker, Marcus Wheaton (plays the Broncos next week and they can't cover all 3 Pitts. guys) and DGB on Tennessee. We'll see if I get any of them. My 3 WR's are ODB, Maclin and Travis Benjamin. Barring an injury, I'm playing all 3 of them all the way through the playoffs so a WR move is down the list.

So, the question is, do I make Taylor or Sefarian Jenkins my 1st waiver claim?  I'm thinking Taylor.



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 Posted: Tue Dec 8th, 2015 07:57 pm
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Angelic Assassin



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Have to go with Thyroid no question.  The Bills play the Iggles after all and Taylor was actually quite good the last couple weeks against the Chiefs and Texans and Tankadelphia has no D whatsoever.

Tamme screwed me over as well so one way or another he's gone.  Sefarian-Jenkins would have to have a monster day to outscore Taylor.

As bad as the "Aints are the can explode for some points so not running the Bucs D out there this week isn't a bad idea; what team is your starting D again.

Diggs is droppable at this point with Funchess even likely to do better.  Can't really change any of your starting WR's like you said, especially with Maclin suddenly remembering how to play.  Wheaton likely the better waiver option as Big Ben has been nigh unstoppable lately.
After you shoot Tamme let me know if you need help disposing of the body.

Effing DeMarco Murray screwed me over so bad this week(in one league both my bench options did better than my starters(Murray and West started,  Ware and Stewart sat) so Murray for sure is getting screwed to my bench this week, meaning of course he'll blow up like the Ultimate Warrior.


I have Cincinnati as my D but considering not starting them this week and dropping either Boldin or DGB to pick up a different D for this week but hanging on to the Bengals.   Kicker is Nugent.

Can't really consider not starting Landry, Watkins and Cooper despite Landry at least, struggling a little.  Reed did nothing over Barnidge this week as well so those two might flip flop. 

My other team is Bortles(lol), Rawls and 1 of West, Ware, Yeldon, D. Thomas, Baldwin, Aiken with DGB in reserve, Rodgers in the even Eifert can't go again(Tamme told to GTFO), Crosby and Cincinnati(though here i do already have a 2nd D in my hip pocket i might start in Detroit for this week.
Good Luck! 



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 Posted: Wed Dec 9th, 2015 02:50 am
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HBF



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My starters are:
Eli (Taylor if/when I get him)
Ingram/D Freeman
ODB/Maclin/Benjamin
(insert Gronk Replacement here)
Chiefs D (best right now)
Cataranzo K

Bench blows: Stefon Diggs, Devon Funchess, Jay Ajayi, 2 handcuffs, Bucs D (got "smart" and picked, played, and got screwed by last week), Gronk (can't come back quick enough).

AA-Bengals held Steelers in line last time on the road but do you trust them to do it again?  Jets D pretty much sucks this year for fantasy but they have the Titans at home and the Titans are a classic up/down team.

Reed plays the 3rd best Bears and Barnidge plays SF ranked 7th against TE so it is a toss up. See who Paulsen & Koerner pick on Fantasypros I guess.



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 Posted: Wed Dec 9th, 2015 03:21 am
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Angelic Assassin



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HBF wrote: My starters are:
Eli (Taylor if/when I get him)
Ingram/D Freeman
ODB/Maclin/Benjamin
(insert Gronk Replacement here)
Chiefs D (best right now)
Cataranzo K

Bench blows: Stefon Diggs, Devon Funchess, Jay Ajayi, 2 handcuffs, Bucs D (got "smart" and picked, played, and got screwed by last week), Gronk (can't come back quick enough).

AA-Bengals held Steelers in line last time on the road but do you trust them to do it again?  Jets D pretty much sucks this year for fantasy but they have the Titans at home and the Titans are a classic up/down team.

Reed plays the 3rd best Bears and Barnidge plays SF ranked 7th against TE so it is a toss up. See who Paulsen & Koerner pick on Fantasypros I guess.
I'm likely going with Detroit as my D in both leagues this week while hanging on to the Bengals.   Detroit has St. Louis which should be fun times for them.  The rankings there favor Reed barely but point projections show Barnidge higher.  Game time hunch I guess.



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 Posted: Wed Dec 9th, 2015 06:19 am
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HBF



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STL seems to have packed it in. If you can play against them that's a great pick.



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 Posted: Wed Dec 9th, 2015 06:26 am
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Angelic Assassin



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HBF wrote: STL seems to have packed it in. If you can play against them that's a great pick.
Detroit this week against St. Louis(last week of regular season), Cincinnati against San Francisco first playoff week, and then Detroit against San Francisco so for Defense I'm pretty well set in both leagues in theory.
Locked in.
Now of course in reality, who knows what will happen but i could gain a big advantage here if other roster slots under produce.  



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 Posted: Thu Dec 10th, 2015 01:44 am
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HBF



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Ingram is likely to miss the rest of the season for a shoulder ailment.

Fuck! My team now has 3 starters injured for a playoff game (Ingram-RB2 and number 5 overall in RB points this season, Gronk-best TE in the league, Travis Benjamin-WR3 and 20th in WR points!). On top of that, Bad Eli has forced me to pick up and play Ryan "Amish Rifle" Fitzpatrick against the Titans.

So my team which should have been this, is now this:

QB-Eli Manning                                 QB-Ryan Fitzpatrick
RB-Devonta Freeman                        RB-Devonta Freeman
RB-Mark Ingram                                RB-Tim Hightower or Ameer Abdullah
WR-Odell Beckham                           WR-Odell Beckham
WR-Jeremy Maclin                            WR-Jeremy Maclin
WR-Travis Benjamin                          WR-Devante Parker
TE-Gronk                                           TE-Austin Sefarian-Jenkins

If I win this week, I'll be shocked. I traded my WR depth to get ODB and don't regret that. I never had RB depth to begin with. My team had the overall best starters arguably in the league with the worst bench.

Last edited on Thu Dec 10th, 2015 01:47 am by HBF



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 Posted: Thu Dec 10th, 2015 02:17 am
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Angelic Assassin



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HBF wrote: Ingram is likely to miss the rest of the season for a shoulder ailment.

Fuck! My team now has 3 starters injured for a playoff game (Ingram-RB2 and number 5 overall in RB points this season, Gronk-best TE in the league, Travis Benjamin-WR3 and 20th in WR points!). On top of that, Bad Eli has forced me to pick up and play Ryan "Amish Rifle" Fitzpatrick against the Titans.

So my team which should have been this, is now this:

QB-Eli Manning                                 QB-Ryan Fitzpatrick
RB-Devonta Freeman                        RB-Devonta Freeman
RB-Mark Ingram                                RB-Tim Hightower or Ameer Abdullah
WR-Odell Beckham                           WR-Odell Beckham
WR-Jeremy Maclin                            WR-Jeremy Maclin
WR-Travis Benjamin                          WR-Devante Parker
TE-Gronk                                           TE-Austin Sefarian-Jenkins

If I win this week, I'll be shocked. I traded my WR depth to get ODB and don't regret that. I never had RB depth to begin with. My team had the overall best starters arguably in the league with the worst bench.

What happened with Thyroid Taylor?  Someone else beat you to him?WR isn't too bad though Parker isn't a given  but RB, ouch.Can you bust OJ ouf of prison?  Even that fat outta shape murdering fuck has to be better than Hightower or Abdullah.  Maybe go for a twofer and drag Hernandez outta the clink as well.

Can't remember if you posted that at all but is your opponent stacked?

Hope for a monster game from your D and or K to offset  TE potentially and RB2 almost surely. 

Looks like I might get Eifert back  and other other team I am seriously looking at putting Stewart in at RB over DeMarco Murray.  



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 Posted: Thu Dec 10th, 2015 02:58 am
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HBF



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I'd definitely start JStewart over Murray.

A guy who has 3 other QB's (Rivers, Stafford, Mariota) actually picked up Taylor before I could!  What a douche! I'm not even playing the fucker this week. Hope he loses in his matchup.

My opponent has:
Ben
Deangelo Williams
Chris Ivory
Shaun Draughn
Antonio Brown
AJ Green
Coby Fleener
Steelers D
Mike Nugent

If the Bengals hold Ben under like last time, I have a chance.



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 Posted: Thu Dec 10th, 2015 03:36 am
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Angelic Assassin



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HBF wrote: I'd definitely start JStewart over Murray.

A guy who has 3 other QB's (Rivers, Stafford, Mariota) actually picked up Taylor before I could!  What a douche! I'm not even playing the fucker this week. Hope he loses in his matchup.

My opponent has:
Ben
Deangelo Williams
Chris Ivory
Shaun Draughn
Antonio Brown
AJ Green
Coby Fleener
Steelers D
Mike Nugent

If the Bengals hold Ben under like last time, I have a chance.
Brown and Green are scary(colors and WR"s) but the rest aren't slam dunk picks in my opinion.  Outside of Big Ben of course.

And yeah that other guy is a douche.  A strategy I guess as there likely isn't a chance he actually planned on starting him, likely just wanted to keep his opponent this week or next if he moves on from having him.  I prefer to focus my attention on players I can use as opposed to players i won't use.  Stewart over Murray it is and likely was always going to be but I like to flip flop players in and out of the starting lineup all week to try and be clever and misdirect my opponent, like that works. 



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 Posted: Thu Dec 10th, 2015 04:15 am
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dogfacedgremlin34
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Angelic Assassin wrote: HBF wrote: I'd definitely start JStewart over Murray.

A guy who has 3 other QB's (Rivers, Stafford, Mariota) actually picked up Taylor before I could!  What a douche! I'm not even playing the fucker this week. Hope he loses in his matchup.

My opponent has:
Ben
Deangelo Williams
Chris Ivory
Shaun Draughn
Antonio Brown
AJ Green
Coby Fleener
Steelers D
Mike Nugent

If the Bengals hold Ben under like last time, I have a chance.
Brown and Green are scary(colors and WR"s) but the rest aren't slam dunk picks in my opinion.  Outside of Big Ben of course.

And yeah that other guy is a douche.  A strategy I guess as there likely isn't a chance he actually planned on starting him, likely just wanted to keep his opponent this week or next if he moves on from having him.  I prefer to focus my attention on players I can use as opposed to players i won't use.  Stewart over Murray it is and likely was always going to be but I like to flip flop players in and out of the starting lineup all week to try and be clever and misdirect my opponent, like that works. 


Stewart's definitely the safer play over Murray. Granted, Murray talked to ownership this week airing grievances about how he's been used, and the last time he did that was one of the few times he had a big game this season, but I'd still go with Stewart. Chip Kelly doesn't know what the fuck he's doing. 



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 Posted: Thu Dec 10th, 2015 04:33 am
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HBF



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DFG, any local sources up there with Gronk news? I need him back as badly as the Pats do!



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 Posted: Thu Dec 10th, 2015 05:39 am
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HBF



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I'm fucked. I have a claim in for Abdullah for tomorrow and will drop Markus Wheaton.  I already dropped Ingram and picked up Duke Johnson (vs. #32 SF run d) in case somebody else cock blocks me. Fuckers!



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 Posted: Thu Dec 10th, 2015 08:03 am
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Benlen
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HBF wrote:   I already dropped Ingram and picked up Duke Johnson (vs. #32 SF run d) in case somebody else cock blocks me. Fuckers!

You shouldn't have done that.



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 Posted: Thu Dec 10th, 2015 08:16 am
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Angelic Assassin



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Benlen wrote: HBF wrote:   I already dropped Ingram and picked up Duke Johnson (vs. #32 SF run d) in case somebody else cock blocks me. Fuckers!

You shouldn't have done that.
You probably should have snagged Steph Curry



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